17 Bible Verses About Being Rude to Others

1 Corinthians 13:4-5

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful.”

Reflection: Paul wrote this to the church in Corinth between two chapters on spiritual gifts, and 12:31 introduces it as “a still more excellent way.” The verb rendered “rude” is aschemoneo, to behave improperly or act unbecomingly; the King James Version has “doth not behave itself unseemly.” In verse 1 the person who speaks without love becomes “a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.”

Titus 3:2

“To speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.”

Reflection: Paul tells Titus, whom he had left in Crete (1:5), what to remind the believers there. The list begins with obeying rulers and authorities in verse 1, and the courtesy it asks for is owed “toward all people.” Verse 3 gives the reason: “For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray… hating one another.”

Philippians 2:3

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.”

Reflection: Paul asks the Philippians to count others “more significant than yourselves”, and verse 4 adds that each should look “to the interests of others.” The verses that follow set out the example of Christ, who “emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant” and “humbled himself” (2:7-8).

1 Peter 2:17

“Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor.”

Reflection: Four short commands close a passage about living under the emperor and his governors (2:13-14). “Honor everyone” comes first and has no exceptions attached; the same word, honor, returns in the last command, “Honor the emperor.”

Matthew 7:12

“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”

Reflection: The saying comes near the end of the Sermon on the Mount, and Jesus says it sums up “the Law and the Prophets.” Luke places the same saying inside the command to love enemies, after “bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you” (Luke 6:28-31).

Matthew 5:22

“But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.”

Reflection: Jesus quotes “You shall not murder” (5:21) and carries the commandment on to anger and words. Where the English Standard Version has “insults his brother,” the Greek has the speaker say rhaka to him, a term of contempt that Strong’s glosses as empty-headed or worthless. Verses 23-24 tell the worshipper to leave his gift at the altar: “First be reconciled to your brother.”

James 3:9-10

“With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.”

Reflection: James has just said that “no human being can tame the tongue” (3:8). His objection here is that one mouth blesses God and curses people “made in the likeness of God,” the language of Genesis 1:26. Verse 11 asks whether a spring can pour out fresh and salt water from the same opening.

Proverbs 11:12

“Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent.”

Reflection: The proverb says the person who belittles a neighbor “lacks sense,” and sets silence against it: “a man of understanding remains silent.” Proverbs 14:21 says more directly that “whoever despises his neighbor is a sinner.”

Luke 6:45

“The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.”

Reflection: Jesus has been speaking of trees known by their fruit (6:43-44), and here he applies the picture to speech. The good and the evil person each bring out what is stored in the heart, and the mouth speaks “out of the abundance of the heart.”

Proverbs 12:18

“There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

Reflection: The proverb compares rash words to sword thrusts and sets against them the tongue of the wise, which “brings healing.” The verse before it sets the honest witness against the false one, who “utters deceit.”

Ephesians 4:29

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

Reflection: Paul’s test for speech is what it does for the listener: it should build up, fit the occasion and “give grace to those who hear.” The next verse warns against grieving the Holy Spirit, and the verse after it lists what must be put away, clamor and slander among it.

Ephesians 4:31-32

“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

Reflection: Bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander and malice are all to be “put away,” and kindness, tenderness and forgiveness take their place. The measure Paul gives is God’s own treatment of the Ephesians: “as God in Christ forgave you.” Colossians 3:8 has a similar list and adds “obscene talk from your mouth.”

Colossians 4:6

“Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”

Reflection: The verse before it tells the Colossians to “walk in wisdom toward outsiders,” and verse 6 carries that on into speech. Gracious speech is meant to prepare the speaker to answer “each person.”

1 Peter 3:9

“Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.”

Reflection: Peter has already given Christ as the pattern: “When he was reviled, he did not revile in return” (2:23). Here the instruction goes further, to bless in return, and verses 10-12 quote Psalm 34: “let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.”

Proverbs 12:16

“The vexation of a fool is known at once, but the prudent ignores an insult.”

Reflection: The contrast is between the fool, whose vexation “is known at once,” and the prudent person, who “ignores an insult.”

Proverbs 15:1

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

Reflection: The proverb concerns the answer given to someone who is already angry: a soft reply turns the anger away and a harsh one stirs it up. Verse 4 of the same chapter adds that “a gentle tongue is a tree of life.”

James 1:19-20

“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”

Reflection: James gives three commands side by side: be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger. The reason that follows concerns anger: “the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God,” and the next verse tells his readers to “put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness.”