How to Overcome Lust as a Christian: What Jesus Said and Steps That Help

A Christian can overcome lust in three practical ways: remove whatever feeds it, tell one trusted person such as a pastor or friend, and decide ahead of time what to do when temptation comes. Prayer and Scripture support all three. When the habit has become compulsive, a licensed counselor can help.

What did Jesus say about lust?

Jesus spoke about lust in the Sermon on the Mount. He took the commandment against adultery and applied it to the eye and the heart:

Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

Matthew 5:27–30

The words “to lust after her” describe a look aimed at desire, not an accidental glance. Jesus also said where such desire starts: “from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications” (Mark 7:21).

One early Christian is reported to have taken such words literally. The historian Eusebius, in his Church History written in the early 300s, says that the young Origen took Matthew 19:12, about those who “have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake,” “in too literal and extreme a sense” and castrated himself. Eusebius saw faith and self-control in the act, but also called it the deed of “an immature and youthful mind.”

John Chrysostom, in his sermons on Matthew, read the passage differently. Jesus, he said, was “not discoursing about our limbs,” because “it is not the eye that sees, but the mind and the thought.” He took the right eye and the right hand to mean a person someone values that highly: if that person “hurts your soul,” the tie must be cut. On this reading the cutting off is done to the causes of sin, not to the body.

Are lustful thoughts a sin?

A passing thought or a moment of attraction is a temptation, and temptation is not yet sin. The Letter to the Hebrews says that Jesus “was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin” (Hebrews 4:15). James describes how temptation becomes sin: “every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death” (James 1:14–15). The sin begins when the thought is welcomed, kept and fed.

Catholic and Protestant teaching both count lustful thoughts that are kept and cultivated as sin. The Catechism of the Catholic Church defines lust as “disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure” (paragraph 2351) and lists it among the seven capital sins, with pride, avarice, envy, wrath, gluttony and sloth (paragraph 1866). Its Compendium says the ninth commandment forbids “cultivating thoughts and desires connected to actions forbidden by the sixth commandment.” The Westminster Larger Catechism, a Reformed Protestant standard, names among the sins forbidden by the seventh commandment “all unclean imaginations, thoughts, purposes, and affections” and “wanton looks” (question 139).

Sexual desire itself is not lust. Scripture tells a husband to “rejoice with the wife of thy youth” (Proverbs 5:18), and Paul advises the unmarried who struggle with desire: “if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn” (1 Corinthians 7:9). In the King James Version “lust” can also mean any strong craving, not only a sexual one, as in “the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life” (1 John 2:16).

How can a Christian stop lusting?

1. Cut off what feeds it

Paul’s instruction is to “make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof” (Romans 13:14). In practice that means listing the particular triggers, which differ from person to person: certain shows, websites, social media accounts or apps, late nights alone with a phone, a certain route or place, or a friendship that keeps drifting toward flirting. Each one then gets a concrete change, such as deleting an app, unfollowing accounts, installing a content filter, charging the phone outside the bedroom, or avoiding time alone with a particular person. When the struggle is mainly pornography, the steps in how to stop watching porn as a Christian go further.

The same passage changed Augustine of Hippo. In his Confessions he recalls that as a young man he prayed, “Grant me chastity and continency, but not yet,” because he was afraid God would answer too soon (Book 8, chapter 7). Some time later, in a garden in Milan, he opened Paul’s letters and read Romans 13:13–14, ending with “make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.” He writes that he read no further and “all the gloom of doubt vanished away” (Book 8, chapter 12).

2. Tell one person

James writes, “Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed” (James 5:16). The person told should be someone mature and trustworthy: a pastor, an older Christian, or a friend of the same sex who will ask honest questions. An accountability partner can agree on regular check-ins, receive reports from filtering software, and take a call or text in the moment of temptation. A small group can do the same. Catholics can also bring these sins to a priest in the sacrament of Penance. The Compendium of the Catechism says grave sins “must be brought to the sacrament,” and it recommends confessing lesser sins as well, because confession helps “to fight against evil tendencies” (questions 304 and 306).

3. Decide in advance what to do in the moment

Scripture’s examples of resisting sexual temptation are mostly about leaving. Joseph, when Potiphar’s wife caught hold of him, “left his garment in her hand, and fled, and got him out” (Genesis 39:12). Paul’s advice is just as short: “Flee fornication” (1 Corinthians 6:18) and “Flee also youthful lusts” (2 Timothy 2:22). Job describes a decision made beforehand: “I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?” (Job 31:1). King David’s fall began with a look from a rooftop at a woman bathing (2 Samuel 11:2).

The plan can be simple: look away at once, leave the room, put the phone down in another room, call or text the accountability partner, go for a walk, and say a short prayer or a verse. When Jesus was tempted in the wilderness he answered each time with Scripture, beginning, “It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone” (Matthew 4:4). Paul promises that God “will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it” (1 Corinthians 10:13).

Idle, empty hours are a common trigger, and the Westminster Larger Catechism lists “idleness” among the things that lead to sexual sin. Jerome gave a young monk the same advice in a letter: “Always have some work on hand, that the devil may find you busy” (Letter 125). Exercise, work, hobbies, time with friends and serving other people all fill hours that would otherwise go to temptation.

4. Fill the mind with something better

Removing triggers leaves a gap, and Paul tells Christians what to fill it with: “whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things” (Philippians 4:8). He calls this being “transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2). A thought that arrives uninvited can be refused and replaced, “bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5).

These verses are short enough to learn by heart for the moment of temptation:

• “Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.” (Psalm 119:11)
• “Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.” (Galatians 5:16)
• “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” (James 4:7)
• “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)
• “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” (Psalm 51:10)

5. See a counselor when the habit is compulsive

Some people find that prayer, accountability and good intentions are not enough to break the habit. The World Health Organization’s ICD-11 classifies compulsive sexual behaviour disorder (code 6C72) as “a persistent pattern of failure to control intense, repetitive sexual impulses or urges resulting in repetitive sexual behaviour,” including the use of pornography. Its signs include “numerous unsuccessful efforts” to cut back, carrying on “despite adverse consequences” or with little satisfaction, and a pattern lasting six months or more that causes marked distress or harm to family, work or social life. The ICD-11 notes that people with the disorder often turn to sexual behavior “in response to feelings of depression, anxiety, boredom, loneliness, or other negative affective states.”

The same entry sets limits. A high sex drive without loss of control is not a disorder, and distress “entirely related to moral judgments and disapproval” of one’s own desires is not enough for the diagnosis. For someone whose behavior does fit the pattern, a licensed counselor or psychologist who treats compulsive sexual behavior can help, alongside a pastor. Seeing one is not a failure of faith, and treating the depression or loneliness underneath often makes the other steps easier to keep.

Can lust be forgiven, even after many falls?

Yes. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). When a woman caught in adultery was brought to Jesus, he said to her, “Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more” (John 8:11). He gave her both the forgiveness and the command.

The New Testament speaks of the fight against lust as ongoing. “Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence,” Paul writes (Colossians 3:5); “mortify” means “put to death,” and the work is done “through the Spirit” (Romans 8:13). Proverbs says that “a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again” (Proverbs 24:16). After a fall, the useful response is to confess it quickly to God and to the accountability partner, then ask what led to it (a time, a place, a mood or an app) and change the plan to close that gap.

How can married Christians keep their thoughts pure?

Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:28 apply inside marriage as much as outside it, and “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled” (Hebrews 13:4). Paul tells husbands and wives to give each other what marriage owes and not to “defraud” one another, except by agreement for a time of prayer, “that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency” (1 Corinthians 7:5). Couples guard against lust by talking honestly about temptation, keeping up their physical and emotional closeness, setting shared limits on media and on friendships with the opposite sex, and refusing to compare a husband or wife with anyone else. A spouse who has hidden a struggle with lust or pornography can ask a pastor or counselor to help with the conversation.

Prayers against lust

The prayer known as the Collect for Purity is said near the start of the Communion service in the Episcopal Church’s 1928 Book of Common Prayer. It asks God to cleanse thoughts at their source:

Almighty God, unto whom all hearts are open, all desires known, and from whom no secrets are hid; Cleanse the thoughts of our hearts by the inspiration of thy Holy Spirit, that we may perfectly love thee, and worthily magnify thy holy Name; through Christ our Lord. Amen.

The Book of Common Prayer (1928), The Holy Communion, p. 67

The same book gives this collect for the Eighteenth Sunday after Trinity:

Lord, we beseech thee, grant thy people grace to withstand the temptations of the world, the flesh, and the devil; and with pure hearts and minds to follow thee, the only God; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

The Book of Common Prayer (1928), The Eighteenth Sunday after Trinity, p. 214

In the moment of temptation

Lord Jesus, you were tempted and did not sin. This thought is here now, and I do not want it. Turn my eyes away, give me the strength to get up and leave, and bring to mind the person I promised to call. Amen.

After a fall

Father, I have done it again, and I will not hide it from you. Forgive me and cleanse me, as you have promised. Show me what led me here, give me the courage to tell the person I need to tell, and keep me from despair. Amen.

Related reading

• Bible verses about overcoming lust
• How to deal with lust
• Constant sexual thoughts