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Japanese A short funeral prayer anyone can say: “Lord God, thank you for the life of [name]. Comfort everyone who mourns, and keep us in the hope of the resurrection. Amen.” A funeral has four main moments for prayer: the opening, prayers for the family, the committal at the grave and the closing blessing.
If you, or someone you are praying for, is thinking about ending their life, call or text 988 in the US, or call Samaritans on 116 123 in the UK and Ireland. There are also more Christian and crisis lines.
Put the name of the person who has died where [name] appears. The 1928 Book of Common Prayer of the Episcopal Church prints its burial prayers for a man, with “our brother” and “his.” For a woman, say “our sister” and “her.”
Opening prayers for a funeral service
The 1928 Book of Common Prayer begins its burial service with words of Jesus from John 11:25–26 and of Job from Job 19:25–26, said as the minister leads the coffin into the church or toward the grave.
I am the resurrection and the life, saith the Lord: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: and whosoever liveth and believeth in me, shall never die.
I know that my redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth: and though this body be destroyed, yet shall I see God: whom I shall see for myself, and mine eyes shall behold, and not as a stranger.
The Book of Common Prayer (1928), The Order for the Burial of the Dead
The same book gives this collect, a short gathering prayer, for a service of Holy Communion at a burial. It suits the opening of any funeral.
O Eternal Lord God, who holdest all souls in life; Vouchsafe, we beseech thee, to thy whole Church in paradise and on earth, thy light and thy peace; and grant that we, following the good examples of those who have served thee here and are now at rest, may at the last enter with them into thine unending joy; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
The Book of Common Prayer (1928), The Collect “At the Burial of the Dead”
A shorter opening prayer in plain words:
Lord God, we have come together because [name] has died. We bring you our grief, our thanks for [his or her] life, and our questions. Jesus wept for his friend Lazarus, so we know you do not ask us to hide our tears. Speak to us through your word in this hour, and give us the hope of the resurrection. Amen.
For more words to begin a service, see these opening prayers for a funeral.
Prayers for the family and all who mourn
The 1928 Book of Common Prayer places this prayer at the end of its service for the burial of a child, but it asks comfort for everyone who mourns.
Almighty God, Father of mercies and giver of all comfort; Deal graciously, we pray thee, with all those who mourn, that, casting every care on thee, they may know the consolation of thy love; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
The Book of Common Prayer (1928), At the Burial of a Child
For the family
Father, this family has lost someone they cannot replace. Be their strength in the days of arrangements and visitors, and in the quiet weeks after, when the visitors have gone home. Keep them patient with one another, and send friends who will help without being asked. Your word says, “Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted” (Matthew 5:4). Comfort them. Amen.
For children who have lost a parent or grandparent
Lord Jesus, you said, “Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not” (Mark 10:14). Hold these children close today. Give the adults around them the words to answer their questions truthfully and gently, and let them always know how much [name] loved them. Amen.
In thanks for a life
Gracious God, thank you for [name]: for [his or her] laughter, work and kindness, and for everything we learned from [him or her]. “The memory of the just is blessed” (Proverbs 10:7). Let our memories become a comfort to us and not only a source of pain. Amen.
When there are regrets
Merciful God, some of us carry words we never said and things we wish we had done differently. Forgive what needs forgiving, in us and between us and [name]. Free us from “if only,” and let us remember [him or her] with love. Amen.
Funeral prayers for a mother, father, husband or wife
For a mother
Lord, thank you for our mother, [name], who carried us, fed us and prayed for us long before we knew it. We give her back to you with thanks. Comfort her children and grandchildren, and let the love she taught us go on in our homes. Amen.
For a father
Father in heaven, thank you for our dad, [name], for his work, his care and the example he set. We commend him to you with love. Help us to carry what he taught us, and comfort all who called him father. Amen.
For a husband or wife
God, you joined [name] and me, and now death has parted us. Thank you for the years we had. Stay close to me in the empty chair and the silent house, and keep me in the hope of the resurrection. Amen.
For a brother or sister
Lord, we grew up together, and I cannot picture the family without [name]. Thank you for every year we shared. Receive [him or her] into your mercy, and comfort our parents and all our family. Amen.
Prayers for the person who has died
Churches differ here. Catholics and Orthodox Christians pray for the dead. The Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches that the living can help souls in purgatory “by offering prayers in suffrage for them,” and the Orthodox burial service asks God to give rest to the soul of the departed. The 1928 Book of Common Prayer also includes prayers for the departed. Many Protestants do not pray for the dead. The Westminster Confession of Faith (1646) says prayer is to be made “for all sorts of men living, or that shall live hereafter; but not for the dead.” Those churches pray instead for the mourners and give thanks for the life of the one who has died.
Catholic prayers
The best known Catholic prayer for the dead is Requiem aeternam, “Eternal rest.”
Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace. Amen.
Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church, Appendix
The older Catholic burial rite has this prayer, said at the funeral Mass and again beside the coffin before it is carried to the grave.
O God, whose property is always to have mercy and to spare, we humbly beseech Thee for the soul of Thy servant N., which Thou hast this day commanded to depart out of this world: that Thou deliver it not into the hands of the enemy, nor forget it unto the end; but command it to be received by Thy holy Angels, and conducted into Paradise, its true country; that, as in Thee it hath hoped and believed, it may not suffer the pains of hell, but may take possession of eternal joys. Through Christ our Lord. Amen.
A Manual of Prayers for the Use of the Catholic Laity (1888), The Burial of the Dead
Orthodox prayers
In the Orthodox burial service the priest says this prayer for the departed.
O God of spirits, and of all flesh, who hast trampled down Death, and overthrown the Devil, and given life unto thy world: Do thou, the same Lord, give rest to the soul of thy departed servant, N., in a place of brightness, a place of verdure, a place of repose, whence all sickness, sorrow and sighing have fled away. Pardon every transgression which he (she) hath committed, whether by word, or deed, or thought. For thou art a good God, and lovest mankind; because there is no man who liveth and sinneth not: for thou only art without sin, and thy righteousness is to all eternity, and thy word is true.
Isabel Hapgood, Service Book of the Holy Orthodox-Catholic Apostolic (Greco-Russian) Church (1906), The Order for the Burial of the Dead
Near the end of the Orthodox service the priest says three times, “Eternal be thy memory, O our brother, who art worthy to be deemed happy and ever-memorable,” and the choir answers, “Memory eternal!”
Anglican and Protestant prayers
At the grave, the 1928 Book of Common Prayer asks God to grant the departed “an entrance into the land of light and joy, in the fellowship of thy saints.” Christians who do not pray for the dead can use this prayer from the same service, which prays for the living:
O Lord Jesus Christ, who by thy death didst take away the sting of death; Grant unto us thy servants so to follow in faith where thou hast led the way, that we may at length fall asleep peacefully in thee, and awake up after thy likeness; through thy mercy, who livest with the Father and the Holy Ghost, one God, world without end. Amen.
The Book of Common Prayer (1928), The Order for the Burial of the Dead
The commendation “Into thy hands, O merciful Saviour” also comes from the 1928 Book of Common Prayer. There it belongs to the prayers for the sick and is said when a person has just died.
Into thy hands, O merciful Saviour, we commend the soul of thy servant, now departed from the body. Acknowledge, we humbly beseech thee, a sheep of thine own fold, a lamb of thine own flock, a sinner of thine own redeeming. Receive him into the arms of thy mercy, into the blessed rest of everlasting peace, and into the glorious company of the saints in light. Amen.
The Book of Common Prayer (1928), A Commendatory Prayer when the Soul is Departed
Committal prayers at the graveside
The committal is the prayer said as the body is laid in the grave. In the 1928 Book of Common Prayer, the minister says it while earth is cast on the coffin.
Unto Almighty God we commend the soul of our brother departed, and we commit his body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection unto eternal life, through our Lord Jesus Christ; at whose coming in glorious majesty to judge the world, the earth and the sea shall give up their dead; and the corruptible bodies of those who sleep in him shall be changed, and made like unto his own glorious body; according to the mighty working whereby he is able to subdue all things unto himself.
The Book of Common Prayer (1928), The Order for the Burial of the Dead
After the committal the service quotes Revelation 14:13: “I heard a voice from heaven, saying unto me, Write, From henceforth blessed are the dead who die in the Lord: even so saith the Spirit; for they rest from their labours.” The Lord’s Prayer follows.
In the older Catholic rite, the In paradisum is said or sung as the body is carried to the grave:
May the Angels lead thee into Paradise; at thy coming may the Martyrs receive thee, and bring thee into the holy City, Jerusalem. May the Choir of Angels receive thee, and with Lazarus, once a beggar, mayest thou have eternal rest.
A Manual of Prayers for the Use of the Catholic Laity (1888), The Burial of the Dead
A short prayer at the grave, or when ashes are laid to rest
Lord Jesus Christ, you lay in the tomb and rose on the third day. We lay [name]’s body here in your keeping and in the hope of the resurrection. Watch over this place, and bring us all at last to your kingdom. Amen.
Closing prayers and blessings
The 1928 Book of Common Prayer ends the church part of its burial service with this blessing, built on Numbers 6:24–26:
Unto God’s gracious mercy and protection we commit you. The LORD bless you and keep you. The LORD make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious unto you. The LORD lift up his countenance upon you, and give you peace, both now and evermore. Amen.
The Book of Common Prayer (1928), The Order for the Burial of the Dead
A closing prayer in plain words:
God of all comfort, we have said goodbye to [name] and commended [him or her] to you. Go with us as we leave this place. Let the love we have shown each other today continue in the weeks ahead, and keep us in the hope of seeing [name] again in your kingdom. Amen.
There are more closing prayers for a funeral for the end of a service.
A grace before the meal after a funeral
Many families share a meal after the burial, called a repast or funeral lunch. This grace is short enough to say before it:
Lord, bless this food and the hands that prepared it. Thank you for [name] and for everyone who has come to remember [him or her]. As we eat together, let our stories and our company comfort the family. Amen.
What Bible verses are read at a funeral?
The 1928 Book of Common Prayer sets passages from 1 Corinthians 15 (from verse 20) or Romans 8 (from verse 14), or John 14:1–6, as the reading, and Psalms 39, 90, 27, 46, 121 and 130 for the service in church. These shorter verses suit a reading or a printed program:
- “Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.” (John 14:1–2)
- “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.” (Psalm 23:4)
- “But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him.” (1 Thessalonians 4:13–14)
- “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)
How is a Christian funeral service ordered?
The order differs by church, but the main parts are similar. The Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church names four parts of a Catholic funeral: welcoming the body with words of comfort and hope, the liturgy of the Word, the Eucharist, and the farewell, in which the soul is entrusted to God and the body is buried “in the hope of the resurrection.”
The 1928 Book of Common Prayer follows a similar path without requiring Communion. The minister meets the coffin with the opening sentences, psalms and a reading follow in church, then, at the minister’s choice, the Creed, the Lord’s Prayer and other prayers, ending with a blessing. At the grave come the words “In the midst of life we are in death,” the committal, Revelation 14:13, the Lord’s Prayer, further prayers and a final blessing.
Can you pray at the funeral of someone who was not a believer?
Yes. The 1928 Book of Common Prayer notes that its burial service “is appropriate to be used only for the faithful departed in Christ,” but in any other case lets the minister use such parts of it, or other prayers from the book, “as may be fitting.” Prayers for the mourners, thanks for the person’s life and the committal of the body to God suit any funeral.
Lord, you knew [name] better than any of us did, and you are just and merciful. We leave [him or her] in your hands. Comfort all who loved [him or her], and draw each of us closer to you. Amen.
