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Summary
- The traditional vow, from the 1928 Book of Common Prayer, takes the other “to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part.”
- Its words are older than the Prayer Book: the medieval Sarum service already had the English vow ending “therto I plight the my trouthe.”
- To plight one’s troth is to pledge one’s faithfulness; “till death us do part” means until death parts us.
- Catholics call the vows the consent: three questions, then a declaration in one of the forms of the Order of Celebrating Matrimony, which the parish provides.
- The Orthodox wedding has no spoken vows; the priest asks for the couple’s free consent, then blesses the rings and crowns them.
- Older Methodist, Presbyterian, Baptist and Lutheran forms keep the same promise in their own words, and some had no ring.
- Catholic, Orthodox and Episcopal weddings use set words; elsewhere the minister decides whether a couple may write their own vows.
Bibliography (Click to show)
- “The Form of Solemnization of Matrimony,” The Book of Common Prayer (Episcopal Church, 1928). https://justus.anglican.org/resources/bcp/1928/Marriage.htm
- “An Order for Marriage,” The Book of Common Prayer (Episcopal Church, 1979), p. 435. https://www.bcponline.org/PastoralOffices/an_order_for_marriage.html
- “The Forme of Solemnization of Matrimonie,” The Book of Common Prayer (1549). https://justus.anglican.org/resources/bcp/1549/Marriage_1549.htm
- William Maskell, Monumenta Ritualia Ecclesiae Anglicanae, vol. 1 (1882), “Ordo ad faciendum sponsalia” (Sarum use), pp. 57–59. https://archive.org/details/monumentarituali01maskuoft
- Catechism of the Catholic Church, paragraphs 1625–1631. https://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/__P53.HTM
- The Order of Celebrating Matrimony, second edition, English translation for the United States (USCCB, 2016), as published by the Archdiocese of Seattle. https://archseattle.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/06/Order-of-Celebration-for-Matrimony-min.pdf
- Diocese of Des Moines, Celebrating the Order of Matrimony, 2nd Edition: Liturgical Guidelines (October 2016). https://www.dmdiocese.org/filesimages/Marriage%20and%20Family%20Life/Marriage%20Prep/Wedding%20liturgy%20guidelines.pdf
- Second Vatican Council, Sacrosanctum Concilium (1963), paragraph 22. https://www.vatican.va/archive/hist_councils/ii_vatican_council/documents/vat-ii_const_19631204_sacrosanctum-concilium_en.html
- “Why can’t Catholic couples write their own vows? This bishop explains,” Catholic News Agency, 9 January 2016. https://www.ewtnnews.com/world/asia-pacific/why-cant-catholic-couples-write-their-own-vows-this-bishop-explains
- “Orthodox Wedding Ceremony,” Questions and Answers, Orthodox Church in America. https://www.oca.org/questions/sacramentmarriage/orthodox-wedding-ceremony
- Isabel Florence Hapgood, trans., Service Book of the Holy Orthodox-Catholic Apostolic (Greco-Russian) Church (1906), the Betrothal and the Crowning, pp. 292–297, and Appendix B, p. 604. https://archive.org/details/cu31924029363128
- John Wesley, The Sunday Service of the Methodists in North America (1784), “The Form of Solemnization of Matrimony,” pp. 150–152. https://archive.org/details/amernorfm00wesl
- Westminster Assembly, The Directory for the Public Worship of God (1645), “Of the Solemnization of Marriage,” 1828 Halifax reprint. https://archive.org/details/cihm_42039 ; transcription: https://relight.app/resource/WDPW.10
- Edward T. Hiscox, The Star Book for Ministers (1878), “Forms of Marriage Service,” pp. 205–206. https://archive.org/details/starbookformini00hiscgoog
- Edward T. Hiscox, The Standard Manual for Baptist Churches (1890). https://archive.org/details/standardmanualfo01hisc
- Common Service Book of the Lutheran Church (1918), “Order for Marriage,” pp. 265–266. https://archive.org/details/commonservicebo00unit
- “A Service of Christian Marriage I,” The United Methodist Book of Worship (1992); The United Methodist Hymnal, pp. 864–69.
- California Family Code § 420. https://california.public.law/codes/family_code_section_420
- Webster’s Revised Unabridged Dictionary (1913): “Troth,” “Plight,” “Depart,” “Cherish,” “Betroth,” “Chattel,” “Worship,” “Hele.” https://www.websters1913.com/words/Troth
- Scripture quotations from the World English Bible (public domain): Genesis 2:24; Ruth 1:17; Ecclesiastes 4:9–10; Song of Songs 8:6–7; Matthew 19:6; Ephesians 5:31–32. https://ebible.org/eng-web/copyright.htm
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